Star Eds Episode 3: War is Ed
by KingKongSushi
Summary: the third episode in the Ed Wars saga


You know the drill. Copyright stuff is on the top of Episode 1.  
Ed Wars Episode 3: War is Ed  
Scene 1  
Location: Kevin's House  
" Double D.... what was that?" askked Nazz. " Well, I just had a bad dream and you were fighting and..... pow pow pow..... Kevin throwing fireballs...and you died," responded Edd. " You know Double D, I know what the matter is. I think that you are in love with me," said Nazz. " I guess," responded Edd. " Double D, that's very sweet and flattering, but I seriously think that we don't belong together. But we can be god friends. If I have problems, I'll just come to you to talk," said Nazz. " Well.... ok.... I agree," sadly responded Edd. "I think I'll go home now." "No,Edd. Please don't go,' begged Nazz. " We can't be BF and GF, but let's settle for the next best thing." " Well, ok," responded Edd as he hugged Nazz.  
Scene 2  
Location: The Cal-de-sack  
" The new guy is here!" screamed Johnny. " What's your name?" The new kid didn't respond. " Seth," he finally said. " Did ya hear that, Plank? His name is Seth!" exclaimed Johnny. "... A board? He talks to a board!" screamed Seth. With that comment he pulled a knife from his pocket and made a very large gash in Plank. " Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" screamed Johnny. " Plank!" Johnny tried CPR, but he put his head down after a few tries. " You FUCKING BASTARD!!" screamed Johnny. He threw a right hook at Seth's face and knocked him down. He sat on Seth, took his knife, threw it to Jimmy, who threw it in the trash, then started to pound Seth. Seth started to bleed, but Johnny didn't care. After a few more minutes, Johnny got up then stomped on Seth's nuts.  
Scene 3  
Location: Johnny's Backyard  
"Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust," sadley said Edd. " Let the cremation begin." Plank was put in a hole. Kevin lit a match and was prepared to throw it in the hole. "No!" screamed Johnny. He dove and grabbed Plank. Then, he ran off. " I guess the funeral's over," commented Kevin. " I guess it is, fucka'" Said a voice. " That sounds like Seth!" exclaimed Jimmy. Three shadows jumpd out from behind the bushes. It was Ed, Eddy, and Seth! " Well, if it ain't traitor and the fag gang," said Eddy. "Yeah fags," added Ed. " Do fags grow on canes, Eddy?" " I thought we went over this last week," responded Eddy. " I have one eyebrow," added Ed. "I bet you have one nut too," added Seth. " Now shut the fuck up!" Eddy and Ed backed up. " I haved no chin," added Ed. " Shhhhh," responded Eddy. " I bet you have no dick too!" shouted Seth. "Yup," responded Ed. All tghe kids gave him a weird look. " Can Double D come out and play?" asked Ed. " I'm right here you fuckin' dumbass!" yelled Eddy. " We came here as a warning," said Seth. " One by one you will my wrath." With that, Seth and the two Eds left. " What the fuck were they talking about?" assked Kevin.  
What the fuck were they talking about? Will Johnny molest the dead body of plank? Why is Ed such a dumbass? Wait..... someone fucked with my script. God dmanit!  
Scene 4  
Location: Nazz's House  
" Shhh come on ," whispered Seth. The three boys climbed in Nazz's window in the early morning. They tied Nazz's hands and feet to her bedposts. Seth Whipped out his knife and started to cut her clothes off. "Let us in too, bud," pleaded Eddy. " No," responded Seth. " This is my action. Go rape Sarah or something." " I've seen Sarah shave her pubes with Dad's face razor," added Ed. " Lucky him," responded Seth, not listening very well. "Wait, dude. That was not cool." THIRTY MINUTES LATER.... " Come on. Let's go," whispered Seth.  
Final Scene  
Location: Edd's House  
Nazz burst through Edd's door, crying. She took Edd in her arms and squeezed. She buried her face in Edd's shoulder. " What's wrong?" asked Edd. " I was raped," responded Nazz. After a lot of comforting words from Edd. She had stopped crying. Edd put his arm behind her neck and started to pull her tohis face. When thier faces were about an inch apart, Kevin came knocking on Edd's room door. " Let's not tell Kevin avout the near kiss," whisered Nazz. "Double D!" yelled Kevin. Edd answered. "What are you doing here, Nazz?"asked Kevin. " I was raped," resonded Nazz. " Who did this!" screamed Kevin. "Seth," responded Nazz. " I'll get the others," added Kevin. When all the kids were in Edd's room Nazz announced that she was raped by Seth. " That bastard!" yelled Johnny. " I think he's kinda cute," added Sarah. She got a disgusted look from the rest of the kids. " Let me fill you in on a few things Sarah,' responded Kevin. " He has four earings in his left ear. He has black hair with green spikes on top. He wears a dog collar. he worships the devil. He's a goth and a dork." " He left a note," said Nazz.  
What does the note say?What the hell is wrong with Sarah? Why can't Edd ever get any? What was Seth thinking? Who was the little faggot who fucked with my script? Find out on the next, shamingly dirty, full of crap episode of Ed Wars, Ed, the New Hope  



End file.
